Tearing Down and Building Up

"So encourage each other and build each up."  1Thessalonians 5:11

We have an ongoing problem in our house with boys who say mean things to each other when they're angry.  Today it was Ian telling Ethan "I hate you!"  After he completed his timeout I had the boys sit down with me and do an activity to teach them about how Christ wants them to treat each other.

They both built a house out of Lego's and we talked about what a builder does.  They start from a pile of supplies and after a lot of hard work they have a house.  I had Ethan read the verse from 1Thessalonians and we talked about what it means to build up a person and what it means to tear them down. (Ian of course took it literally and talked about how to build a person:) I took them by surprise and knocked down Ethan's house and it broke into a bunch of pieces. (On one hand it wasn't wise for me to do it because he got extremely upset but on the other hand, it helped with the message I was trying to relay).  After I helped Ethan calm down, I pointed out to both of them that when they say hurtful things or call each other names, they are tearing each other down like I did Ethan's house.  I also pointed out that like the house Ethan built was a masterpiece to him that he worked hard on, so is each person in the world a masterpiece that God created.  When they say hurtful things to someone else they are also hurting God.  I then knocked down Ian's house and explained to them that before they say anything hurtful in the future, I wanted them to remember what it felt like to have their house torn down.  I encouraged Ethan to remember just how hurt he was when I knocked down his house so that he would remember that God is just as hurt when we treat each other unkindly.

I had a moment of thinking that I ruined the teaching moment when I saw how upset Ethan was but when he realized that it was part of the lesson I was teaching, he told me he forgave me, gave me a hug and he then helped Ian understand the meaning behind what we did.