Summer is for Art

These slower days of summer have afforded us more time for art projects.  It is challenging to find projects that both boys can do.  My plan is that while Ian is in camp, Ethan and I can do projects together that would be too much for Ian.

This is a castle we made using various items we found around the house.  Ethan put the pennies on as windows.  And the catapult at the top of the picture is my sad attempt at catapult design.

Glitter is so much fun!

The boys loved decorating old t'shirts with fabric paint.  The shirt on the right side is the one Ian was wearing when he painted the one on the left:)

Ethan took his time and made sure he tried out every color.

We blew through drinking straws to create this "fireworks" picture.

Ethan had been having fun with my misc. scrapbooking papers and made all these flags which we glued on our fireworks paper to create a poster for the holiday.

Gratitude List #20-30

"Gratitude is the culture of the sinners made saints" This quote comes from Ann Voskamp on her Holy Experience blog.

And my list continues as this sinner is being refined into a saint saved by God's grace.

My prayer journal has really tranformed my life.  And adding poetry to my prayers has sweetened those prayers.  Recently I thought I would try adding collaging to my prayers.  This is my list of graces I thanked the Lord for this week.  I'm not very artistic, but for me, collaging is therapeutic and connects me to where my heart needs to be.  I really enjoyed it and found my mind totally focused on gratitude to God as I looked through my magazines.  Highly recommend it!

Trying Again

Our allergy/asthma doctor called the other day about Ian's bloodwork and said that he needs the pneumovax shot and she wanted us to try CT scan again.  As a side note, I had the pneumovax shot recently myself and it actually worked for me, reducing the frequency of sinus infections--woohoo!  So today we tried for the second time to get the CT scan done on Ian.  I decided to try a different place and gave him Benadryl beforehand.  It didn't make him sleep but did seem to mellow him a bit.  So he laid very still and we got it done.  I was amazed!  Now, if only I could convince him the vaccine would be just as painless!

Church Boating and Beach Day

We hung out with our church family yesterday on the river. The boys had a great time boating and playing in the water. We couldn't talk Ian into tubing with Ethan but he did ride in a kayak. I have wanted a kayak for as long as I can remember so I'm excited that the boys liked being in one--maybe one day I can get one:)

Christ in My Heart

Recently, Ethan and I talked about Christ living in our heart and what that means. We discussed how are heart is changed and how he changes us. We both did a drawing symbolizing our discussion which I uploaded on a previous post.




This year I've been really intentional about using poetry as a form of worship in my quiet time and I've shared some of those poems on here. I haven't usually blogged about what inspired my writing and I should. So the poem I'm posting today is about Christ living in my heart and my heart being his home.

Christ in My Heart

As you walked through my front door,
I'm not sure what you'll think or say
There's been few guests here anymore,
I tend to keep everyone away

You glance at the piles here and there
I try to explain them away-
too busy, too sick, no time to spare
though I've had time to go out and play

I point to others and compare;
other homes are worse than mine
Trying to act as if I don't care
as though everything here is fine

You smile, take my hand and say
"I've known you before you were born
the mess in here is not okay,
it's all weary, worn, and torn."

Gently you show me the dirt and grime
that's been hiding in each room
Not knowing it's been here all this time,
I now see the dust's rising plume

Room to room we clean dirt and grime
"We'll not finish," I start to fear
"Don't worry child, I have the time"
We take it, day by day, year by year

Much has changed while time has past
My home's much cleaner inside out
I am free of the burden at last
For you're always with me, I've no doubt

God Shaped Hole

The concept of a "God Shaped Hole" is attributed to Blaise Pascal, a scientist from the 1600's.

"There once was in man a true happiness of which now remain to him only the mark and empty trace, which he in vain tries to fill from all his surroundings, seeking from things absent the help he does not obtain in things present. But these are all inadequate, because the infinite abyss can only be filled by an infinite and immutable object, that is to say by God Himself."

Each afternoon I feel like I am a ref. for a wrestling match so today I tried to plan ahead and think up an activity to do that would keep the boys engaged and not fighting. Today I had Ethan listen to the song "God Shaped Hole" by Plumb and we talked about what it means to have a hole in our hearts where God is supposed to be. We discussed all the different ways we try to fill that hole with activities, possessions, people, etc. only in vain. True joy and happiness is found when God fills that hole for us. We talked about the scripture that God "has set eternity in the hearts of man"; we all feel the void and know that something is missing.

We then traced Ian on a large piece of paper (which he thoroughly enjoyed) and then made a "God shaped hole" in the center of the drawing. We thumbed through magazines to find words and pictures of things that we use to fill that hole, the idols of our heart, what we worship instead of God. Ian of course didn't understand the activity but Ethan did and it prompted some good discussion. When Ethan worked on drawing the face he said, "I'm going to draw him with a sad face because he doesn't have God in his heart."

Gratitude 15-20

#15: Babysitters who fold the laundry
#16: Blue skies
#17: Collaging with friends
#18: Smell of coffee in the morning
#19: the smell after it rains
#20: my kid's sense of humour

Teach Me Jesus

I recently posted a list of resources we've used/are using in teaching the boys about Jesus. I've gotten requests to continue providing resources and so I thought I'd try to do a somewhat regular post about resources I've come across, teaching moments we've had, as well as general thoughts and challenges we've faced in bringing up our children "in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."

One of the main passages in scripture that is always on my mind and heart is in Deuteronomy: "these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." (6:6,7) When I think about what Moses is saying, I realize that I am to literally teach my kids about God and his plan of redemption continually. It's an overwhelming thought as to how to always be directly turning the boys toward Christ.

But then I remember a quote from John Calvin in his commentary on Psalm 78: "The fathers, when they find that on the one hand they are the means of providing for the salvation of their children, should, by such a precious result of their labours, be the more powerfully stirred up to instruct their children. The children, on their part, being inflamed with greater zeal, should eagerly press forward in the acquisition of divine knowledge and not suffer their minds to wander in vain speculations, but should aim at, or keep their eyes directed to, the right mark. It is unhappy and wretched toil to be "ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." (2 Tim 3:7).
God has chosen families as one of the primary ways in which children are taught about the Lord and we as parents have a very serious responsibility to instruct them in the Lord. While there is much for them to learn in scripture, two important areas are development of Christian character and teaching them the gospel. One way that we've been teaching Christian character in our home is through our "24 Family Ways." I've referred to this before in previous posts. It is essentially our list of family rules of how we relate to God and to each other. I came across the 24 Family Ways from Clay Clarkson and decided I couldn't improve on it and adopted it for our family. The Dugger's (if anyone watched TLC you know who I'm talking about) have a there own list of family rules you can access in their book or better yet, you can even make your own. Our list came with a devotional book and a coloring book. During the school year we work on our catechism and the devotional that goes with that but during the summer we like to review our 24 Family Ways. One nice thing about having a list of family rules is that you can refer to it when you are addressing a problem. For example, if one of the boys is talking about wishing they had a similar toy that a friend has, we respond: "Remember our Fox Family Way? We are content with what we have, whether it is a little or a lot."

Today we had a teaching moment come up which gave me the opportunity to teach more about forgiveness. Ethan was very upset about his brother taking a toy from him. He continued to be upset about it even after the situation had been resolved. He likes to have his back rubbed, so I rubbed him back to help him calm down and while I did that we talked about the scripture that teaches that if we do not forgive others when they sin against us, God will not forgive us our sins. I referred also to scripture about God putting our sins away as far as the east is from the west (and challenged him to figure out how far that is:). Since the God who created the universe, who created us and chose us as his children, who forgives us of each of our sins and who in fact dies for those sins, forgives us, shouldn't we also forgive brothers when they sin against us?

Moses knew what he was talking about when he instructed parents to train their children in the word from the moment they get up until the moment they lay down because he knew that the teaching opportunities are endless and they keep coming:)

"If I say, "Yes, I forgive, but I cannot forget," as though the God, who twice a day washes all the sands on the all the shores of all the world, could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
Amy Carmichael

Saturday Fun

I talked some friends into spending a Saturday with me and the boys since George was working. We went to a HUGE playground that was a few stories high, played in the water play area and went to a science museum that was next door. The kids had a blast! We also went to visit George at the fire station. The kids got a tour of the station, toured the rescue truck and fire trucks and then got to practice using a fire hose.

A Hot Father's Day

My husband had to work yesterday so we met him at church this morning. We had no grand Father's Day plans, just the hope of a restful afternoon. While George was taking a nap, the kids and I were playing and I noticed it was feeling warm. At the same time, the computer wasn't working, one of the tv's and the Wii. As it turns out, the AC is broken and the Wii is burned up. We're thinking maybe we were hit by lightening. So George went to the office and brought back two AC's and set them up around the house. Instead of heating up the kitchen more by cooking one of his favorite meals as I had planned to do, we decided to head out to dinner. So no AC and no Wii, Happy Father's Day!:)

List of Graces

God is so good, He continually showers me with graces to remind me that He is watching over me and of his love for me.

#15: An unexpected answer to prayer I never prayed: Sometimes God answers a prayer that you had never thought to pray, never took the time to, or simply thought the matter was too little to bring to Him. My husband is always working and lately he's had to work even more (if that's possible) and he was supposed to work for some people at the FD, this Saturday and the following Saturday. He found out today that the guy who needed him next Saturday didn't need him anymore. What a nice and unexpected grace!

#16: Everytime your child smiles at you it's as if the world has stood still and you wish you could just grab a hold of it, tuck into your pocket and bring it with you wherever you go. Today Ian finished his week long swim class and he and his coach were showing me what he had learned. Ian had the cutest and sweetest smiles for me after every skill he demonstrated. I've never seen him so proud and I so wished I hadn't forgot my camera:( But I am grateful to have witnessed it and count it as a grace from God.

Grateful 11-14

More for my gratitude list:

11. Good morning hugs from the boys

12. Good night hugs from the boys

13. Waking up to find "I love you" notes from my husband, one for each of us, waiting for us at the breakfast table.

14. The smell of fresh baked banana bread: grateful that God provides our daily bread and thankful knowing my family is fed.

Summer Fun

Summer has officially started now that school is done. Ethan started a swim/tennis camp this week and Ian is taking his annual swim lessons. Ian has recently learned on his own, accidentally I think, to tread water and lift his head up to take breaths. His coach is working with him on taking breaths and swimming on his back. Ethan loves his camp and has decided he wants regular tennis lessons (George isn't thrilled, I guess he doesn't think it's a very manly sport:). Ian however is not thrilled. He refused to go to his lessons this morning and would not put on his swim shorts. So I put him in the car with no clothes on and by the time we arrived, he decided he'd rather swim with shorts on than go naked. Good choice, I say!

This summer we plan to go to the beach weekly and of course swim in our pool whenever we can. I've collected a number of science, art, and other fun projects to do during the summer whenever the kids seem bored and we've done a few do far and have had lots of fun.

We used some found objects around the house to do a space picture. Ian and I did one as a joint effort. Ethan and I discussed what it means to have God living in our hearts and drew pictures about our heart being "Christ's Home." We did an experiement with Ivory soap-blowing it up in the microwave which was a big hit. Today we built a marshmallow catapult. I think most of the excitement there was the fact that they got to eat marshmallow's:)

Gratitude List #7-10

Certainly there are more than a thousand graces God gives me and while I could list my thousand right away, I really want to savor the experience of reflecting on each grace and how God shows his love to me. Some of them are little and may seem insignificant but each joy, each blessing, each beauty I behold is a gift from God and a reminder of who he is.

7. Blogging: Blogging has been a great blessing and way for me to share my mothering experiences with others. I've also learned a lot from reading other blogs of moms who are on the same journey and what they have learned as they have traveled the path God has laid out for them.

8. My prayer journal: My prayer journal has been such a blessing to me. It has been a great way for me to share with the Lord, to keep track of my prayers, to stay on task and not get distracted, and too really express myself without my thoughts getting lost.

9. Coffee: A great blessing! What would leisurely breakfasts, rushing mornings, deep conversations and a trip to the book store be without coffee?

10. Bed time singing with my youngest: My oldest doesn't care to sing at bedtime anymore but my 2yr. old does. I love to hear him sing "Jesus Loves Me" at the top of his sweet little voice. I know he won't enjoy it much longer so I am enjoying it while I can.

That's all for now!

5 years and counting

This month marks five years that I've been doing this blog. It seems like a long time but at the same time it doesn't feel that long at all. I started the blog as a way to share photos of Ethan and document his development for those who live far away and didn't get to see him all the time. Over time it has changed into something more.

I've been able to use the blog to share challenges and struggles with being a mom as well as the changes God has been doing in me along the way. The blog has also brought me opportunities to make a little money through advertisement. I've also done book reviews for a publishing company (and earned free books:). The last five years have documented the kids chronic illnesses, their boyish antics and injuries, and fun family vacations. I was able to chronical my pregnancy with Ian and then his birth. On this blog I've also shared funny stories of the kids, the silly things they do and say and the joy they bring to our home. I've shared my struggles with depression, sleep deprivation, uncertainty, disappointments, fears, and the work the Spirit is doing as He refines me into the mom He wants me to be.

As the kids grow there continue to be more challenges, journies, adventures, and learning opportunitis both for the boys and for myself. God has a wonderful story written for our family and I am enjoying documenting that story as it happens in this blog. For anyone who has been following My Life As A Mom, thank you and keep visiting to see what's going to happen next.

Gratitude List

To continue my list of the graces God grants me for which I am thankful:

4. The different ways the Spirit speaks to my heart: Yesterday, I mentioned having a moment of crying while out driving. Today, I found myself driving up over the same bridge, looking out over the water and as I drove up I was singing along with Michael W. Smith the song "Mighty to Save." Tears were stinging my eyes but this time it was in response to worship and praise to my savior and as I drove to the top of the bridge, I realised that yesterday I had been crying at the same spot about Ethan going to kindergarten. It was a neat moment where the Spirit encouraged my soul.

Mighty to Save

"Everyone needs compassion
A love that's never failing
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a Savior
The hope of nations
Savior, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever, Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as you find me
All of my fears and failures
And fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender
Shine your light and let the whole world sing
We're singing for the glory of the Risen King, Jesus"

5. Books: I have many, many books that God has blessed me with. I have a hard time getting rid of any because I have a memory or emotional feeling attached to each one. They take me to places I've never been, feed my hungry soul, make me smile and laugh, make me think about things I hadn't considered, warm my heart, challenge my mind, and refresh my spirit.


A Book

"There is no frigate like a book
to take us lands away,
Nor any courses like a page
of prancing poetry.
This traverse may the poorest take
without oppress of toll;
How frugal is the chariot
that bears a human soul."

Emily Dickenson

6. Kind friends who share their books with me when I run out of ones to read.

7. Websites like Amazon where I can buy new books when my friends don't have any to lend (and it arrives in three days!).

Feeling Sad

Out of the blue yesterday, I started crying while driving. I was thinking about Ethan starting kindergarten soon and I realised I really don't want him to go. I guess it could be that I don't want him to grow up? I don't know. I still have this burden on my heart about homeschooling. I don't know why it's still there. We had compromised on Christian school and then when that didn't work out we settled on the public school and I thought I was okay with it. But I guess I'm not. Five seems to young to send a child away for 6 hours a day. I really feel like he needs more maturing before he's ready to be pushed out of the nest and into the world. I'm not sure why I still have this desire since we've made a decision about his schooling. This burden to homeschool the kids started when Ethan was about 18months and really has never gone away. I really feel like this is a burden God placed on my heart and gave me the desire for because I NEVER wanted to before. But Ethan is going to public school and I wonder why is the homeschooling thing nagging at me? Gosh, once they are both in school I'll have so much time to myself I won't know what to do! Why would I want to give that up to educate them? So here I am crying again, Ian sitting on my lap, and I'm wondering why God hasn't taken this away from me?

Gratitude Community

Is the glass half empty or half full? This is a proverbial question to determine whether you're an optimist or a pessimist. I've always leaned more to half full or as some would say, "a realist." I also struggle with depression and I'm always trying to find ways to prevent depressive symptoms. A friend recently sent me a quote from a John Piper book where he was writing about the life of William Cowper who had suffered from depression. The quote referred to those of us who are given to much introspection and analysis. He says "Periodic self-examination is needed and wise and biblical...mental health is the use of the mind to focus on worthy reality outside ourselves." Piper referred to this as a "healthy gift of self-forgetfulness."
A blog I've been following has a "gratitude community" of bloggers who are blogging a 1000 things they are grateful for. The list is an act of worship to God for the daily graces he gives us. In reading the blog and thinking about it, it seems like a way that I could have some healthy self-forgetfulness. When we spend our mental energies on the many gifts God has given, it keeps us from being focused on our problems, worries, and fears.

And so I decided to join The Gratitude Community.




So here's a few to start my thousand with :

1. God's mercy: Daily I am reminded of God's mercy to me. When I am confronted with my sins each day and see the depths of that sin, I am grieved by how I have treated God. But then He reminds me immediately that His grace is sufficient for me and that Jesus died for each one of my sins; including the times I speak unkindly to my family or when I choose something else over spending quiet time with God.

2. The joy on my son Ian's face every morning when I hand him his soymilk to drink.

3. Coming to the kitchen in the morning and finding little notes my husband left for each of us before leaving for his shift.

3 down 997 to go.

Grad. Pictures

Proud Parents


With Grandma and PopPop


Pre-K


Coming down to Pomp and Circumstance




With teacher Miss Bonnie

Graduation

Today Ethan graduated from Pre K. He's no longer a baby, he's growing up! They were all wearing cap and gown and received diplomas. So cute! I actually didn't cry as much as I thought I would. His teacher wrote a poem to the class and read it to them. They said some of the memory verses they had learned this year as well as some songs. His teacher sent him home with a collection of art work he had done during the year and we enjoyed going through it and seeing his progression in artistic skill. His teacher had actually written down onn all of his art the story behind his drawings-aliens, battles, car races and all. Pictures to soon follow.

Christian Life

I am continually in prayer asking the Lord to grow me in holiness and as the kids get older it seems to require of me a more fervent prayer. I know I've posted before that having children really showed me the depths of my sin that I may not have learned about myself had I not had children. The more that I see my sin and experience the grace of God, the more grace that I need to extend to the boys. As Ethan gets older, I'm very convicted about the importance of him seeing me always in the word and in prayer. One reason is because the more that I "hide God's word in my heart" the more scripture I am able to spontaneously share with Ethan when he has a problem, fears or need for discipline. The past year, God has been gracious to place people, circumstances, scriptures, and even books by Christians that have helped me in this goal.

There are a few authors who write a great deal about growing in holiness including Bridges and Piper but if you go back to early church history Augustine wrote passionately about this subject.

He says, "The whole life of a good Christian is a holy desire." Or in Piper's words, "the key to Christian living is a thirst and a hunger for God." If you truly love someone, you want to spend all your time with them getting to know them and just being in their presence. This is my desire that I would love God so much that it would be a "desperation to be ravished for the sake of worship and holiness (Piper)." And that I would set an example for the boys that they would grow up and look back on their childhood and that the strongest memory they have is of their mother's faith.

"You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever."
Psalm 16:11